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Ted Nugent Celebrates Trump’s Presidential Victory: ‘Thank You, America’

Chip Somodevilla, Getty Images / Ted Nugent Facebook
Chip Somodevilla, Getty Images / Facebook

Ted Nugent has responded to Donald Trump’s surprising victory in last night’s presidential election with an exuberant, “Stranglehold”-quoting Facebook Live session. “Are you kidding me? America still has a soul. Not everybody, but enough of us. We went to the Concord bridge and we stopped the enemy.”

“I’m actually a little teary-eyed this morning,” a frazzled but clearly overjoyed Nugent confessed. “We declared our independence, and we told Hillary Clinton we don’t accept liars, scammers, thieves and rotten freedom-hating, constitution hating, conniving criminals to be President. Thank you America, good going. Good work!”

After extolling the virtues of hard work, Nugent implored his followers to reach out to Clinton-supporting “zombies”: “Take a deep breath, and try to educate them that there’s no such thing as free. There’s no free phones, we bought those for you. There’s no free education, you’d have to take our money to pay for it. There’s no free fuel subsidies, we paid for that … the redistribution must stop. We will help the needy, not the greedy.”

Nugent then praised and promised to kiss and caress America’s “beautiful” middle finger, and vowed to “bash down tall buildings” with his mighty scrotum (over the repeated off-camera “stop it!” protests of his wife, Shemane). The Motor City Madman then summed up his thoughts and vowed to somehow be even less restrained in the future by quoting his 1975 anthem “Stranglehold.”

“God bless America, I’m feeling mighty good,” he said. “And you know the only thing more dangerous than a sow grizzly bear cornered with cubs? Ted Nugent with more confidence! Oh, we’re in deep s— now. You thought I was hard-hitting before? ‘Here I come again now baby, like a dog in heat. You can tell it’s me by the clamor now, baby, I like to tear up the street. Now I’ve been smoking for so long baby, you know I’m here to stay. I’ve got you in a stranglehold motherf—-ers, get the f– out of my way.'”

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