What Would Have Happened if the Boston City Hall Cop Went Down a Slide at Water Country?

We are just now recovering from the aftershocks that occurred when a Boston Police Officer decided to try out a children’s slide at City Hall Plaza. For those who can stomach this heart-stopping display, here it is again to jog your memory.

While driving along Route 1 in Portsmouth, though, I had a truly terrifying thought: what if that officer had gone barreling down a slide at Water Country?

So, I asked Brenda Tharp, my sixth grade science teacher, who taught for over three decades at North Hampton School. She explained:

“It is all about the kinetic energy of the police officer. The kinetic energy of the police officer is greater than the kinetic energy of a child using the slide b/c of his greater mass. If said police officer were to go down a slide at Water Country, he would create a decent splash, but hopefully would not receive any injuries this time due to sliding into water and not sliding into the ‘ground’ at the end of the playground slide!”

Added John Croteau, my biology teacher and a long-time member of the science department at Winnacunnet High School:

“It’s an excellent example of how synthetic fibers create a low coefficient of friction.”

New England weather expert Mark Rosenthal was hesitant to comment on the meteorological impact of the Boston City Hall policeman going nuts on a slide at Water Country, as there are numerous variables to consider.

But it’s safe to say that with New Hampshire on pace to set a record for most summertime rain, we can be glad to have avoided such a monsoon. But maybe some local educators could take their students to Water Country this September for a fun field trip, and reenact such an occurrence.